Words of Affirmation: Speaking Love to Your Loved One

I had a realization one time while reading “The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts” by Gary Chapman. I read it with my wife Angela. It was eye-opening because many times I tried to show her love, but it didn’t seem to connect the way I expected. As a result, I’d find myself frustrated, assuming she was ungrateful.

But that wasn’t the case.

This book showed me something profound: She wasn’t the problem. Instead, I was attempting to express love for her the way I wanted her to express love for me. Our wires got crossed. It was all lost in translation. I needed to learn to communicate in a way that meant the most to her. It was a moment of clarity that hit hard.

I learned this valuable lesson: If you want to improve your relationships, you must improve your communication. To put it simply, it’s crucial to learn the art of communicating love in the native tongue of your loved one.

One powerful way to achieve that is through words of affirmation.

Words of Affirmation: Speak Love

Love languages, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, offer insights into how individuals express and receive love. For those whose primary love language is verbal affirmation, words become the medium through which love is most profoundly felt.

If your in relationship with a person who’s primary love language is verbal affirmation, then what you say and how you say it matters. Basically, your words hold the power to nurture them emotionally and instill them with confidence and trust. In effect, you foster a deeper sense of connection and the relationship improves.

How to Communicate Love Through Words

  • Give Compliments: Genuinely acknowledge and highlight the strengths and qualities of your loved one. Celebrating both their big achievements and small efforts. Use your words to create an environment of positivity and appreciation.
  • Offer Encouragement: Encouragement provides solid support during challenging seasons of life. Remind your loved one strengths and make sure they know you believe in their abilities to persevere and overcome.
  • Communicate Feelings: Verbally sharing your emotions can create an intimate bond. Express why your loved one is special to you and the depth of your affection.
  • Express Gratitude: Expressing gratitude for their presence in your life and the positive impact they have on you reinforces how valuable they are to you. Doing this regularly strengthens the bond you share.


Understanding and employing the language of love is a transformative journey. As we navigate relationships, learning to speak in ways that truly resonate with our loved ones can bridge emotional gaps and deepen connections. The power of words of affirmation is immense; they hold the potential to heal, uplift, and fortify relationships. So, let’s embrace this beautiful language of love, weaving words that celebrate, encourage, express, and appreciate, thereby enriching the tapestry of our relationships with warmth and affection.